6 Things to Ask Yourself Before Entering a Long-Distance Relationship

By Marina Krivonossova on March 5, 2021

Relationships are never easy. But when you take things to the next level and add the long-distance factor, things are only bound to get more complicated. If you and your partner find yourselves in a situation where your only options seem to be entering a long-distance relationship or breaking up, it’s fair to have concerns about whether this is the right choice for you. Maintaining a long-distance relationship is challenging, and doing so is certainly not the right choice for everyone. If you find yourself in a situation where you’re considering one, here are 6 things to ask yourself before entering a long-distance relationship.

1. “Do I really love my partner, or am I just scared of breaking up?” 

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Ending a relationship is never easy, but a lot of people seem to think that pursuing a long-distance relationship they’re not passionate about is easier than breaking things off. If you truly believe that this is a relationship worth pursuing, then long-distance might be for you. But if the only thing holding you back from ending things then and there is the fear of what happens after you break up, then long-distance might not be the best course of action. Just as with any relationship, a long-distance relationship should only be something you enter if you truly find it to be in your and your partner’s best interest.

2. “Do I see a future with my partner one, five, or ten years from now?”

Long-distance relationships are a lot of hard work, and they’re not worth investing your time or effort into if you don’t see that relationship going anywhere in the future. If you think you and your partner would have broken up after college anyways, or if you would prefer to chase your dream job even if it means losing your partner, then long-distance likely won’t be something that makes sense for you.

3. “Can I imagine my life without this person?” 

If imagining life without your partner is easy, and if you see a future with someone else instead, then entering that long-distance relationship certainly isn’t worth it. You want to commit to a relationship — and particularly a long-distance one — with a person who adds value to your life. And if your partner is no longer that person, and if you think your life would be just fine (or even better) without them, avoid getting into that long-distance relationship.

4. “Is there a realistic opportunity for us to be permanently reunited in the future?”

(Image via pexels.com)

One thing a lot of couples often don’t think about is the idea of closing the distance in the future. Long-distance might be fine for a while, but for how long are you willing to put up with it? A few months? A year? Even longer? It’s important to have that conversation with your partner about when the two of you could be together again, or if an indefinite long-distance relationship is what you’re going for. What matters is that both of you are genuinely happy with the conclusion that’s reached regarding this question.

5. “Have we had major communication issues before, even when there was no distance between us?”

Communication is an integral factor to making any relationship work, but it’s particularly the case with long-distance ones. If you and your partner already struggled majorly with communication while living nearby and regularly seeing each other, these communication issues will only be amplified when you’re pursuing a long-distance relationship. This is another thing that’s worth talking through with your partner before making a choice about the future of your relationship at a distance

6. “Am I making the right choice for myself?”

Last but not least on my list, this question is the most important one to address at the end of it all. Even if your answers to the previous questions all seem to point towards the fact that long-distance would be doable for you and your partner, none of it matters if you feel like you’re not making the right choice for yourself. Consider your education, your career, your goals, your ambitions, and your life plans. Does long distance seem to get in the way of that? At the end of the day, you need to be making the choice that feels right for you.

As someone who has been in several long-distance relationships, I can vouch for the fact that it’s certainly not for everybody. Long-distance relationships require a lot of trust, hard work, communication, and dedication to your partner and the relationship. Some people have no issues with them, and other people are absolutely against them at all costs. That being said, I hope my list of six things to ask yourself before entering a long-distance relationship offered you some clarity and insights about whether or not pursuing one is the right choice for you.

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